it's a piece of chalk, actually

[unblinkered]

Parking on the street at Brenda's is full. It's what he gets for showing up for the 7:30 rush, instead of his usual 6AM. He takes the Volvo around to the back parking lot- the one that's not connected to the road, where you have to drive over the curb. It's... probably a parking lot. It's paved, after all. It's on the coffee shop's property. There's no "employee only" signs, anyway. There is, within reason, room to park a car. Maxwell Wax is sure the management will understand, if they even leave their room long enough to notice.

Hm? Who's this? Some kid in a hoodie, smoking a cigarette behind the building. He's standing right in the way of... what looks more or less like a parking spot, off to the side of some graffiti on the ground. He honks at the kid, who panics and drops his cigarette. Wasn't even lit. Did him a favor, in Max's opinion. He knows firsthand how bad those things can mess you up. He watches the kid round a corner, and pulls into the probably-parking-space. 

He hears a snapping sound as he pulls in. Must've run over the cigarette... do cigarettes go "snap"?

In his rearview mirror, he sees nobody standing on top of the graffiti, and then abruptly sees somebody standing on top of the graffiti. There is no transition between these two states.

Comments

[from_scratch]

"Transit is indeed live-human-initiated only. It's sort of just called Hell? I mean - there are demons and lakes of fire in it, but there's also a sense in which we're just called demons. And the lakes of fire are for garbage disposal, since we can only make stuff, not get rid of it. I have detected no evidence of a deity orchestrating anything. When I used to talk to angels they never mentioned one either. Demons and angels as groups don't care for each other for stupid racism reasons, it's annoying, makes the interworld mail system all screwy. Demons are the ones with bat wings who make stuff, angels are the ones with bird wings who change stuff, there's not a lot of fancy metaphysics on top of that unless I don't get briefed until I've been a demon for fifty years or something."

[unblinkered]

"And... is all this... which way do the arrows go with how... I assume it's not a coincidence that there's all this mythology about demons and angels and such, but... you said you went to hell when you died, so are... the bat wings and such... somehow reflective of unrelated cultural icons, or did Hell somehow... influence human culture such that... bat wings, I'd imagine it's the first thing, since you couldn't culturally influence the existence of bats..."

[from_scratch]

"Okay, I didn't actually have the wings right away when I died. Most demons aren't dead people, they just happen, I have no idea why or how, and those have bat wings. So when dead humans become demons we make ourselves matching wings, since, flying, awesome, and looking like an angel in Hell, not so awesome, and fairy wings don't actually work, they're for decoration, fairies are telekinetic, so that kind of limits our options. I'm pretty sure no real bats have blue wings."

[unblinkered]

"So... you can modify your appearances, then. Likely to be... some kind of cultural phenomenon, not a fundamental part of..."

Okay, Max is realizing there were more important questions.

"So- Hell, what- are there different places for- where is Hell, is it... another planet, and I teleported you, or is it a parallel world, or... how does it relate to the universe? Should I be worried about physics?"

[from_scratch]

"Hell is natively infinite vacuum which is not physically contiguous with - this." He waves, generally, at the entire mortal world. "Demons have added things to it; most of the civilization is on a gigantic tacky plane of solid gold. I am not a physicist, so I can't tell you much about whether any laws of physics are being broken apart from our ability to make stuff and be summoned, but when there is a source of gravity water flows downhill and my laptop works and stuff like that."

[unblinkered]

There is half a sigh of relief.

"And... 'making stuff', is that... what does that mean? If you wanted to just 'make' a phone, could you do that, or would you need to... know how phones work, and how to build one? Do you know where the... information content, so to speak, of things you make comes from?"

[from_scratch]

"I can copy things without knowing how they work. Angels have a harder time with the detail work - and they're slower - and they need raw materials, so being a demon is the best deal overall. But I do have to know something about what I'm copying. I can make a book I've never read with title and author, but I can't just guess that there must be a book with such and such an ISBN and produce a copy. Also, I'm pretty sure if I make a phone it will not start out subscribed to Verizon or whatever phone companies are popular these days."

[unblinkered]

"That's a... really strange limitation, actually. You can make a book using a title and author, but not if you make up a title and author, or an ISBN... your magic system would have to have some sort of... underlying search capability, so that you can ask for Moby Dick by Herman Melville and the magic does all the work of figuring out what that is and where to find all the words to put inside of it. Is there... does anyone know what does that, or is it-" there's a brief pause, he makes a face- "-an unsolved mystery?"

[from_scratch]

"If there's a solution to it, I don't know about it. There's not really a thriving demonic science community - not that demons don't do science, there's just dramatically less collaboration when you don't need to band together for funding in order to have all the sciencey swag you may want."

[unblinkered]

"And- do fairies and angels run on similar systems? Infinite void, some are people but others just appear, mysterious magic powers... or are they each their own kind of thing?"

[from_scratch]

"Fairies get Flatland with preexisting air and plants and geography and wildlife, it sounds like it's really pretty there from what I've heard. Angels get infinite glowy cloud-fluff that they tunnel through to make other things. I think both of them work on the mostly spontaneously generated, some dead humans, deal."

[unblinkered]

"And... christ, it's an afterlife? You got killed, and... were you Bad, or- how worried do I need to be about, about being killed, now that I know this stuff?"

He looks around nervously. Whoever that was in the hoodie, earlier... Max doesn't want to tangle with them, considering how much more they must have known.

[from_scratch]

"Not everybody turns into a daeva when they die, I know that much, most people wind up in Limbo, but I don't know how the sorting works. Demon is what I would have picked, but I don't remember making a decision. I don't think I was bad by any conventional definition. And I would be a bit worried about getting killed if I were you."

[unblinkered]

"...Limbo. That's... I mean, I'm worried about getting killed, sure, but not the same kind of worried I'd be if I hadn't just had the existence of an afterlife confirmed."

He frowns.

"Is Limbo... unpleasant?"

[from_scratch]

"Limbo sounds - disappointing. It's a flat place with air in it, like Fairyland, but there isn't any of the stuff - I am informed that Limboites get stuff when they die and appear there, and they'll take presents from demons when we get concordances, but otherwise it's just dirt and sky going on forever. It's not like it's a disaster if they don't have water or food or whatever - they're just as indestructible as daeva, we can get thirsty but not really as far as parched, same with hunger etcetera - it's just. Boring."

[unblinkered]

"It's got people in it, doesn't it? Hard for anywhere to be boring when there's people. Why else would I keep coming h-"

Wait.

"Wait. Wait. Indestructible?"

[from_scratch]

"Yeah. I can get hurt, just not very much. If you shot me I'd bleed but not break a rib. Kindly don't try it."

[unblinkered]

"And- indestructible generally, or indestructible as in can't die? Is there..."

Today may be a very good day to cancel his health insurance.

[from_scratch]

"Oh, I'm thoroughly immortal, it's pretty great."

[unblinkered]

A grin spreads across his face.

"So... you said you were trying to spread the word on this, right? Before you got shot?"

Max holds out his cell phone. He is very much in favor of secrets being revealed, especially when they are highly convenient secrets that will make his life easier. And if the secrets are not revealed, it seems likely that the current pattern will hold wherein nobody knows what the hell is going on with all this afterlife business.

[from_scratch]

"Yeah. That was the plan. Not my first order of business with the phone, though."

Cam takes the phone and dials and waits.

[unblinkered]

Max opens his car door and retrieves a notepad and pencil from a bag on the floor while Cam makes his call. He peers at the chalk circle and starts copying it down- two halves on separate pages, in case drawing it would actually summon another demon.

[from_scratch]

"Dude, that is not a good circle, it is not safe, I will teach you to do a safe circle later if you want," says Cam, conjuring water to rinse away the chalk. "It's - Dad! Dad don't hang up it's really not a prank I swear to - oh god this is a long story."

[unblinkered]

"HEY! I was-" he sputters, but is swiftly distracted by noticing the water-conjuring. The wings and the sudden appearance had been enough to suspend his disbelief, but the reminder that the demon was telling the truth jars Max somewhat.

Also, he's calling his dad?

[from_scratch]

He appears to be totally calling his dad.

"No, it wasn't - not exactly, but I'm here now - Dad, okay, listen, in case something happens, draw on the garage floor in anything handy, chalk's fine - draw a circle with a gap in the line, big enough to stand in, and around it write legibly these exact words, do you have a pen - okay - I summon the demon, insert my full name, to appear in this circle. And if I don't show up to visit, or if I visit and then I vanish suddenly, draw the gap closed. It's a long long fucking story, I will be there to help with the incredulity thing soon, okay, but do you have those words down? Okay. I need to call Mom, is her phone number the -? Okay. I love you too. I'm so sorry."